Moving

Blogs.

Clearly I'm not very good at them. I haven't posted here in a few years but unemployment does strange things to a girl.

Since my last post I have left Canada, moved to England and completed a Masters. Now though it is time to move again. Packing up my life and shipping it all back to Canada. Finding a job. Cleaning. More cleaning.

Lots is going on here and I am slowly going to start documenting things again. Next week is graduation, and after that we are taking a weekend to explore Norfolk.

Anyways, this is the reactivation.

The influence of documentaries

  So a few weeks ago those of us that were contract staff were temporarily laid off, and in an attempt to fill my time I watched food documentary after food documentary.  Well you watch enough of them and they are bound to get in your head.

  Hungry for change and Vegucated back to back are what did it I think.  With a few TED Talks thrown in for good measure. I finally hit a level of guilt and frustration about my eating habits and I knew I had to change something so I am "weekday vegetarian" which means that I can have meat on the weekend if I want to, but Monday to Friday, it's all about the beans, legumes and greens.

  I don't have a problem with eating meat, and my general philosophy was that growing up and living near a Mennonite farming community that the meat I was getting had lived a good life, but I know that's not the case for most farmed animals.  Julian who a) requires more calories than me and b) lives for bacon and meat sweats, so his pledge was to be a better omnivore.  Eating more parts than just the prime cuts.

Dancing Weather

The weather almost everywhere is unseasonably warm.  The last week of March is approaching and rather than wondering whether to dress for thunderstorms or rainstorms people are walking around campus in shorts and bikini tops trying to get their tan on.  After being the cranky pants who walks around talking about how this is global warming and unnatural and aren’t any of these people just a little bit concerned?  I got the flu.  Stuck in bed, hacking out a lung 100 degree Fahrenheit Flu.  I couldn’t go outside, I could barely roll off my effin couch to make my way into the bathroom and even doing that would work up a sweat.  It’s been 3 or 4 days now, I’m feeling a lot better even if my lungs still aren’t on board with the whole ‘healthy moving around’ thing yet.  I put on my headphones and I realised all my music was summer related from last year, or from my trip to New Zealand last year.

This is weather that I normally embrace, I live in Canada, unseasonable? Yes. Un-enjoyable? Only when being a killjoy. 

So I’ll stop being a killjoy,  I’m going to go outside and play frisbee and chase my boyfriend around a field after a soccer ball like I did in highschool when I was young and stupid and lived every minute with extremes!  (I’d say with joy and love but would be overlooking the natural teenage tendency to fall into utter despair when things don’t go exactly as planned).

This is dancing weather, this is bbq weather, this is living life with frisbee in hand weather.

There are 4 weeks of class left, I don’t have a job, and my sister is trying to plan her wedding.  Right now I am wired on cough meds and wishing someone here would run around outside and dance with me.

May I have this dance?

Falling off the internet

I avoided my computer this weekend.  I pretended that like some bad disease it would suck me under in terrible ways I couldn’t and wouldn’t understand.  Sometimes being on the computer and internet for school is too much, and then we go and have social media, and blogs and podcasts that we want to listen to and they all require the internet and I wonder how I got on before my family got the cursed thing when I was in grade 7. 

This weekend I got to remember. They were/are called books.  I used to read all the time. I always had a book on the go, I would often even be reading them while watching TV which baffled my family a little.  I devoured a new one this weekend and realised I’m getting slow, I used to finish a small novel this size in a day, two tops and here I am on Monday still trying to finish a book I started Saturday afternoon.

I fell off the internet this weekend.  I got no school work done, but it felt great, and I can’t wait to do it again.

Before…

Before I ate wheat.  I was addicted to bread, pasta, baked goods, cereal, couscous.  It was in multiple meals in large servings, it was my snack it was everything.  So in December I tried a detox, I gave up wheat (and a bunch of other things) and then I slowly re-introduced things I had gone without and saw how my body reacted.  The answer is that my body DOES NOT like it when I eat wheat.  It now tells me in no uncertain terms each time I eat wheat that I shouldn’t, I get zits, I get upset stomachs I get sluggish and gross feeling.  So I tried to keep wheat out, but I haven’t been doing a very good job.  So I’m going to try and be better about it, because  I think it is tanking my immune system as per being plague ridden.

So I’m sick, which means that I’ll be home a bit. So I’m going to set some goals.  Here are the before photos of the areas I want to clean… providing I don’t you know curl up into a ball and pass out.

Culinary Disaster

So I tried to make a lava cake thing tonight.  It tasted AWFUL!  It seemed really simple, I halved the recipe to save on some butter, and baked it in little spring form pans.  I bought raspberries and blueberries to serve it with, thought about making whipped cream, (but am glad I didn’t, it would have been quite the waste).  It was to be the end of a great valentines out.

The end result was sugary and gross.

I usually have great success with baking and new recipes.  However this was just a disaster.

I find myself asking was it the cocoa being old?  Was it the flour?  Did I not mix the sugar and eggs long enough?  Not clarify the butter right?  I have mastered angel food cake, cream puffs, breads and pretzels but this simple recipe seems to have eluded me.  So for now I ditched the left overs and will not try this recipe again.  Though maybe I’ll keep my eyes out for a new version with less sugar.

It also might be time to buy new cocoa.

Grateful continued

I haven’t been updating with everything I am grateful for.  I guess I’m not very good at staying on top of things here on the blog. 

I am overall feeling more positive.  Though I still catch myself in strange dark moments, where things seem bleak and I don’t know why.  Today I am grateful for the simplicity of things like red lentil curry, and wheat free cinnamon crunch granola on plain yogurt. 

For flowers on the valentines day weekend, and for home made muffins (I might have made a lot of these).

For taking the time to have coffee with my sister, for the creator of black bean chips (and the chips themselves), for a cat that knows just how to suck up to her owner caretaker.  For ravelry and the world of awesome people it opened up, for loose leaf tea that makes a galaxy in your cup when you steep it right (the key is you aren’t supposed to use a disposable tea bag… just a strainer or you filter out the sparkles)…

I need to find something amazing for my swap partner on the Pi/Pie Swap… I mean more awesome than what I already have.

Being Grateful – Day 2

Yesterday I was supposed to post my first three things I was grateful for and I got so tired after finishing my proposal for class that I shut down my computer and refused to even check if I had class today.  It just wasn’t worth knowing, I was too tired to go.  However, determined to think of three things I was grateful for I spent a bit of time thinking about it before bed and just wrote it on a piece of paper.

Here they are… I am grateful for knitting because it keeps me calm and sane and busy.  I get to make beautiful things for people I love and in a zombie apocalypse I will have the ability to loot yarn stores and create clothing for myself and loved ones.

Next I am grateful for two people and they each count as one thing I am grateful for.  My dear roommate here at school who listens to me bitch about my program and laughs with me (and sometimes at me, I can do stupid with the best of them).  Also my res program friend, who chills with me, shops with me, and also bitches with me about the program.  Those were my three for Tuesday.

Today is Wednesday and to be perfectly honest I am struggling for the my three gratefuls.  I guess the first one is easy.  Every other Wednesday is Knit Night at a coffee house in downtown St Catharines and I am grateful to have a group of people who love to craft, accept my youth and are open and accepting.  Five months ago I had never been near downtown St Catharines and I was terrified to venture into a strange shop, to meet a group of strangers.  They were so open, accepting and supportive!  They shared the excitement of finally getting my spinning wheel and finishing projects.  They enjoy nerdy things and I learn as much from them about their jobs as I do at school about the one I want.

I guess my other grateful is going to be puppies!  We had therapy dogs visit residence tonight.  It ended up solidifying my determination that I will one day have a dog of my very own.  Particularly a dachshund, they are adorable.

Lastly I am grateful for cooking blogs.  Yes that’s right I am grateful that other people cook like crazy and blog about it.  Why?  It’s very simple really, if someone took the time to create a beautiful step by step blog post for me to follow it is likely that the food will be very tasty.  Also things I never thought I would be able to make like these delicious looking pretzel dogs (hello treat for a valentine!).

They seem like trivial things to be grateful for, but I guess if we don’t take joy in everything small and large we will be very depressed.  So I will continue to smile stupidly at wonderful signs and take joy in puppies and knitting.  The people are big though, I think any person that takes the time to be a friend is a big deal. 

Positive Energy

So my dear friend Amie keeps a wonderful blog, it is much more complicated than my own little setup and she is much more dedicated.  So she posted this link to a TED Talks lecture. Shawn Achor : The happy secret to better work, is a talk that is both humorous and motivating to change the way we think.  If you aren’t familiar with TED Talks browse the website take some time to browse other talks, they have a ton innovative ideas.

The idea behind this talk is that you function better when you are positive, and that the happy has to come first, then your brain functions more effectively.

One of the tasks set to help create the positive brain energy and increase how you function is 3 Gratitude's. For 21 days find 3 new things to be grateful for every day.  This is my February challenge. Starting later today (because it is midnight on February 7th) I am going to try and think of 3 new things to be grateful for every day for the rest of the month.  I feel like after I should turn it into a tumblr blog, maybe that will come next.

For now (this counts as one of my Feb 7 grateful) I am grateful to have a group that is flexible for my year long project, it would be brutal if they weren’t.

Goodnight blogosphere

Headache, Wheel, and really wanting sleep

Well, after a psycho busy weekend, this evening my body gave up on me. Well actually it gave up on me last night but I was in denial until now. I feel awful and Advil has done nothing to relieve the attempts by my right frontal lobe to crawl out my eye. I mean, my brain isn’t succeeding (my eye is in the way) but the pain isn’t going away either and I’ve tried my whole series of tricks.

My wheel is waiting quietly in Waterloo for a return when I have time to start spinning.  I look forward to it.

Right now I just want to go to sleep and make my brain stop hurting.

Till next time dear blog.

Finally

 

10 months ago I bought a spinning wheel… and then it got “lost” in the mail (there are some suspicious minds in the family who think it stolen… I might be one of them).

My sister and her fiancé just got back from New Zealand yesterday and they are my super-heroes.  They went to Ashford Craft Shop for me and picked up my new wheel. So today I lovingly waxed each and every piece, then assembled them to create the beauty you see on the left.

That is the Traveller.  She is all mine! Assembled and waiting for the wonderful fibre I can spin on it. So now all I need to do is finish my homework then I can get spinning.

 

Cats and Self-Confidence

Some days I want to be a cat. Even a cat of the most noble bulk (being really frickin big) can stalk across the room with self assurance that they are Gods and everyone should worship them . You are there to serve them, so love them… NOW.

I need to learn to be like my cat. I should be worshipped, I am gorgeous, and gosh-darn it you should love me right NOW. 

Where is this coming from?  I had a crisis of appearance on Friday. The problem I face is my program tends to attract very fit girls who look great all the time (though I’m sure they would tell me differently).  I suffer from a lack of fitness, lack of fashion, and lack in subtle makeup.  Maybe part of the problem is that I see such a big difference in myself when I dress nicely or do makeup that it always feels fancy.  I’ve always looked in the mirror and said, “This is way too much for everyday, people will think I’m crazy to wear this much makeup”.  When I think about it I know girls who don’t leave the house without doing at the very least foundation or tinted moisturizer and something around the eyes.  So why am I so hung up about this on me?

It comes back to being like a cat.

A cat wears anything with full confidence (and occasionally with vengeance in their hearts…) and I need to learn to do that too.

Tomorrow I am joining weight watchers.  I know I said I’d give myself some time, but I need the help.  Wednesday and Friday I am going to the gym.  It is time to get this thing going and with my addiction to baking I’m not doing well on my own.  It wont solve body image, that is all me, but it will bring me closer to the goal of being healthy.

Sick… but still working

I can’t make this long (or can I?) because I should probably go and get some school work done. This is my procrastination.

After work yesterday my cold caught up with me in a big way. My muscles still are hating me and whenever I get sick my jaw hurts (why I dunno, but it is super weird). I think the worst part is I can’t stop sneezing, or get rid of the pre-sneeze feeling. My tracking project got put on hold this morning also because of my cold, as did the soup making. So sadly this post is a little less colourful than I thought it would be. The only soup I’ve had is premade chicken broth with zucchini and quick cook vermicelli noodles. Cold food.

Blergh so far this is just me complaining about having a cold. Deepest apologies, allow me to move on.

12 days people. After almost a year of waiting, my spinning wheel (and my sister and her fiance) will be coming home to Canada. Guess what I am doing Sunday January 29th? I will post pictures I promise because it will be epic and awesome and mine (finally).

The problem I face then is this.

I live with a cat. Cats like to chase yarn, and they love to sink their claws into soft stuff.  I know from first hand experience that Suki in particular is very good at drafting expensive fibre (she got into the box of fibre when it first came and I had to yell at her a bit…being a cat I don’t think she cared). If I leave fibre on my wheel Suki is very likely (a guaranteed will) to get into it and I will come home for the weekend to find my special fibre spread around the house in little fluffy balls and Suki happily nested into a cluster of these very same fluff balls like royalty.

Some of you may (will certainly) say, close the door where you keep the wheel. But if I keep the wheel in the bedroom, if my Spartan forgets to close the door in the morning Suki will come in to play with my wheel. The other room on the main floor is where her litter box is so I can’t close the door there. The basement is laundry, and the computer room. Also not good places to keep my new wheel.

The conundrum shall be figured out soon. I’ve got 12 days.

Life is too short for bad yarn

Note: Please bear with me as I play with formatting sentence structure etc. this will go on over several posts but who gets good without practice?

Ok, so yarn diet? Maybe even in my stash their is some unwanted weight hanging around. Also if you count roving (I don’t but that’s me, there is still a lot of work before it becomes yarn) I’ve cheated 2 weeks in. If you are strictly counting yarn? I deserve a frickin Platinum medal because I spent almost 4 hours in a yarn store without buying ANY yarn. That’s right, 0. Platinum – Olympic athletes have nothing on my self restraint.

Today I took a workshop with Kate Atherley from knitty.com and it was amazing. I bought her book (and some Alpaca roving shhh!). In her book there are little blue boxes with tips and quotes and fun. One says life is too short for bad yarn. It is so true.

So I looked through my stash.

Am I really going to use that pastel toned Bernat satin (probably not), the nubby acrylic (I don’t even know what it is…), glow in the dark plyarn (well it is so COOL!!!).  Life though is too short to work yarn that squeaks on my needles, so I think it is time to pack it into a bag with some clothes that don’t fit and donate them to someone who will use it. Maybe someone just starting out who doesn’t know what really nice fibre feels like (ignorance is bliss). So while I try and shed a few pounds on my body I will shed a few from my stash as well. This may be at least in part due to laziness… I promised myself I would update my stash page on Ravelry and donating this means I don’t have to go through the effort of cataloguing it all.

  So what am I working on right now? A sweater… That is me with the swatch, it is untreated, all natural wool from New Zealand and it smells like sheep! I was shamed into test washing my swatch after the workshop today. I realised that if it was going to shrink, I should find out before I finished the sweater back and cast on the sweater front. Good news, I got lucky, no shrinking (though lots of potential for felting if the finished project gets agitated).

I should be more specific than just sweater. It is the Shawl Collared Sweater from Berge France knit using Wanaka Station All Natural Wool from black sheep. The colour is an all natural deep brown, like bark on a tree. I am not making it for myself (sadly many wools make me itch like crazy even with a thin cotton layer between us, there are a few exceptions and blends are my hero). I am making it for my boyfriend of 6 years. I figure that is an acceptable length of time and perhaps if what comes next is the sweater curse perhaps it is time. I believe though that we will move forward together with him dressed sexily in a nice rich brown sweater.

Tomorrow I work. Monday dear Spartan (my boyfriend but because that is silly I shall call him the Spartan) and myself are going out to look for some animal tracks. It is for a school project, my goal is to have the minimum done early, and then go above and beyond when time permits. I will also make soup. Maybe I will try photographing soup making and post it on the blog. I think more pictures are needed than those of my cat and me with a yarn swatch.

Who knows maybe I will even weigh in same day as Toronto Mayor Rob Ford, (though I think he will loose the equivalent of me, where I only have about 20 pounds to loose. Ok perfect honesty? I have maybe 40 pounds to loose. But I’m going to talk to my Dr about that and see what weight she wants to see me at then aim for that. What is healthy. That is the goal).

A New Year – A New Diet

This year I have two new “diets” or goals for the new year. Bare with me, I know this is a crazy time of year for this type of thing.

First is health. I started this last year by visiting a naturopath and seeing what my body was, well I guess “sensitive” too because I’m not truly allergic. At least not collapse on the floor – can’t breathe- swollen face- allergic. Just like wheat gives me acne. That sort of fun.  So, with that in mind, and getting sick of being winded after climbing only 3 bloody flights of stairs, I made the resolution to be healthy this year. Not like give up sugar and only eat raw veggies healthy – like balanced meals, more exercise and making the move to achieve the weight my doctor would LIKE to see me at (she has told me for several years I could probably do well to loose a bit of weight, but I mean there is hearing it, and deciding to DO it and now I’m on board too so everything should run a little smoother). Coming up in March is my physical, and with going to the gym 3 times a week and a change in eating habits (more veggies, fewer cookies, but still having cookies) I am hoping to loose a pound a week for the next 8 weeks. (technically I’m giving myself 10 weeks for the 8 pounds but still). The idea being that if I can keep on track on my own then I wont pay for help from a company, and if I can’t make it move, I will need additional help. I have done weight watchers before, but didn’t finish reaching my goal. Why 8 weeks do you ask? Well I will still be a student so the rate is cheaper, and if I do it before their promotion ends then I don’t have to pay registration fees.

Next the yarn diet. Yarn diet. It hurts to say it. Here is the truth. I have lots of yarn, in fact I have more than enough yarn. Many knitters would probably say this is silly. My stash has not exceeded what I can knit in my life expectancy, but to my family it seems like an extreme amount. So to help my stressed out budget and growing student debt I am invoking the yarn diet. This is where except for one super secret super special project I have planned I am not permitted to buy new yarn (or roving) until I have a. used up my current supply (ahahahaha) or b. I have a permanent job, or c. the year ends. I am making 1 possible exception (I know I know its January this is a bad sign) I signed up for a workshop last year that happens this weekend and I might not have yarn in the right weight to work with. So for this, I might buy 2 balls in the right weight to get through the class.

Back at school things are starting off nice and slow. I think it should be a good semester and fingers crossed about job prospects. That’s all for now, I hope everyone else has great new years goals and I will try of course to update a little more frequently.

25 Days

   There are many things to do, clean the house for the holidays, figure out what is going on with my spinning wheel, send out my holiday cards, buy people Christmas gifts, maybe buy a new pair of jeans? And homework. Lots and lots of homework. Over the next 25 days there is a ton of homework to do but then… but then… I’m done for a whole 3 weeks!

    I’ll get to knit, and bake pies, and watch cheesy Christmas specials. I can watch a Muppet Christmas Carol repeatedly and go for walks in the evening to see my neighbours Christmas lights. I can finally settle in and just relax (maybe clean my keyboard too, the J key is just kind of sticky)

   I finished the scarf, pictures to come when I have them. It is currently blocking upstairs. I am so proud of myself for finally finishing the darn thing now I can knit other stuff just for fun. My little cat friend is still as noisy as ever. Right now is quiet time because she is sleeping, but that can only last for so long, then the noise Siamese cats are known for will start again.

  Lately a couple things have kept me going. One is Knit 1 Geek 2, a set of lovely ladies with a podcast about knitting and being geeky. It keeps me light and laughing when school is dragging me down. For now though I’ll leave you all to get back to the real world. Hope everyone has a good time over the next week. Till next I have a chance to type.

Heather

When we are young there is no doubt in our hearts, only a full and complete belief that we CAN do anything. Such is the faith of our youth that no others doubts can hurt our dreams.

Then those doubts become your own. Every small perceived flaw or mistake torn apart by our own super critical, expecting a standard of ourselves no one else can even see.

Disbelief at kind words, offerings of too little too late, for we calmly say thanks and add on our own "but I didn't/don't/can't/"

So I tell you now only belief in your own abilities and your desire to try can limit you. Failing is a terrible word, trying and not getting the right answer is only failing when we don't try again. The person that hurts is only yourself. So try, believe, and do.

A mistake is the obstacle we make it, keep it in scale, because it is hard to crawl back on top of the elephant when we fall off, but you probably only fell off an mouse.

So with that esoteric motivational blurb I leave you to the night, and shall try to sleep like my body probably wants.

Goodnight world, I'll try all this again tomorrow.

Cat Pinned

This is what it looks like when a cat pins you. Please note the smug appearance and paw holding down her my arm and pillowing her head.  This is what happens when you sit still for even a little bit of time in this house now. Suki (exhibit A) has decided that I am her personal couch, so are visitors to the house, my darling man, the couch, the kitchen… you get the idea. I am not usually a cat person, I make an exception for her.

I am taking advantage of being cat-pinned to update this blog since I pretty much fell off the face off the earth with all of this. Firstly I’m back in school, it’s driving me insane but I’m working through and its only 4 weeks of class and a week of exams before I get my life back for a couple of weeks.

When I get my life back I plan to do a major knitting inventory for my ravelry page. My Stash (for any non-knitter tuning in this roughly relates to my closet full of yarn, shh don’t tell!) needs to be fully catalogued (I really don’t know what I have to work with so I am going to catalogue it all and then I can use it up (hahahaha) or at least use some of it. I also want to get some serious knitting done, mittens and hats and maybe a sweater! So excited!

The knitting that is holding me back is a scarf I’m making for my man’s sister. I’ve been working on the damn thing since September and it is literally CREEPING, small quarter inch by quarter inch. It is my goal to complete that project before the end of the semester (this weekend would be great but not likely happening).

Till my next update world!

Heather

Hello World,

I'm full of news today. My graduation has been delayed, which has been devastating but I'm adapting. I need (of all things) electives, which at least will be fun. The cell biology final is coming up quickly (April 13th) and I'm way behind. Making this post probably isn't helping, but I think it is time to vent a bit. I have an essay I'm writing and units still to do, the essay at least I've worked on a bit.

Other news: I might be getting a car. A honda Civic, probably a boring colour but in general a reliable car that is ALL MINE... no more mini van! This is super exciting for me because I'm growing up. When I travel, my mom will have use of the car and the van can cough its last gasping breaths.

Yesterday I spoke with a travel agent about my New Zealand trip and instead of being "awesome I will help you plan your trip" she was all "No way should you be travelling alone, do your parents know?"

Do my parents know! Ummm yeah they know, and guess what EVEN IF THEY HAD A PROBLEM I WOULD STILL GO! There are people who have been kicked out of their house at 18, traveled all over the place and are alive and well with awesome stories to tell.

Ok if I'm missing something then I will post again. Unfortunately knitting is a little on hold. But I will get a chance to pick it up again soon.

Mistakes involving Tea

My Mom has a pleated tea cosy in orange and gold that she has had for over 30 years. Her mother-in-law made it for her, and since that Grandma passed away before I was born my Mom has saved that tea cosy. It is important to note, these are my Mom's least favourite colours from the 70's. The pattern itself is from the early 60's and earlier this month I was given a copy mixed in with a bunch of Vogue Knitting magazines.

I have numerous teapots and none of them have cosies. As I drink a lot of tea, and often need to microwave the last cups to get them warm enough, I decided it was time I make my own tea cosy. I chose to make it for a 6-cup teapot I keep at my boyfriends house and went out with my Mom to the yarn store. I resisted the suggestion to buy calmer yarn (browns, blues, whites or black) and went for a deep purple and what might be called acid green. On a smaller teapot the combination would likely look nice, however I do not have a small teapot.

The result was this...



Needless to say it's not what I was going for. I did not account for the different style of teapot. However I will use it until the garish acrylic yarn breaks or I get sick of people making fun of it. For now I will be strong and proud, because I learn best by making mistakes.

Lesson: just like in clothes, if it looks good on one person/teapot, it wont necessarily look good on you/your teapot.

Lesson Learned...